“THE ANSWER”

I apologize up front for any of you who are here to find “THE ANSWER”.  I wish I had “THE ANSWER” for you, as it is in my nature to be helpful.  But, alas I am in the same boat a lot of you are in while trying to maintain some semblance of sanity, humor and decency.  I do hope to progress out of the hole.  As you can see in a previous post, hope and humor are two of my greatest weapons in the attack on my substance of being. 

I am in grief (and that is what it is) loss of job, loss of health, loss of significant other and any loss that takes something from our life, puts us in stages of grief. Each of us withdraw from the pain and seek out a comfort zone.  As an adult, with others dependent on you, your own solace becomes a luxury.  We sublimate (written about in a previous post) those primitive urges (anger) into more acceptable ways of expression. 

So much is written about being positive and thinking positive, on and on, ad infinitum.  That is not the place I am at right now.  The problem comes when being positive is what you practiced and believed in and then you are gut punched.  I have not lost my belief in the power of positive thinking, I can’t stay down forever, I will not.  But, for right now, do not come with your cheery self (you still have your job, your husband/wife, your bills are paid, your health is fine) and give me platitudes.  I am working on it in my own way, just be a friend in a real way, share my pain of where I am at right now.  Say, I am here if you need to talk or if there is anything I can do.  Now, that gives  comfort. 

Interesting links I found today about the long term unemployed speak about their experiences.  http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/down-not-voices-long-term-unemployed-125453267.html

http://downbutnotoutletters.tumblr.com/

Another day floating on my iceberg, see you in cyber-space friends. 

Comments

  1. Papercut DollJuly 15, 2011 at 10:07 AM

    Now I'm intrigued, Going to read some more. Sounds like you're in a tough place right now and I do know how that feels :( I can't give you the answer either - I'm still looking for it but I'll do you a deal, if you find it first make sure I get a glimpse and vice versa :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I_ArtManJuly 15, 2011 at 9:22 PM

    i understand your dismay that positiveness didn't prevent your fall. i am a little resentful of my situation also. i can't afford to be alive. but i am a chin-up guy; dyed in the wool. i spend every day trying different things to rise above poverty.
    some of the government programs i hear about, i search for online, looking for a form to fill out and get some results. grants for artists, for seniors, food stamps etc. always a dead end with no way except to get up early and go somewhere and get in line... it gets hard to wait all day to talk to someone. i have been in los angeles for eleven years. the first seven i was a homeless artist using the boardwalk to eke out the sustenance to survive each day. my record of no money was 14 days in the november rains... i wrote a lot of poems in anger then. now at least i have $860 a month retirement benefits. but my rent is $760. how does the government consider that is enough to live on?
    scott cumming, (I_ArtMan)

    ReplyDelete

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